Pairing Wines with Calgary Stampede Food

The Calgary Stampede is infamous for its "culinary" offerings. Each year, someone finds a way to reinvent an already greasy or fatty food and make it even more greasy or fatty. Claire Biddiscombe, Wine Access' editorial assistant, and I decided to investigate some of the food at this year's Stampede to see if we could pair it with wine.

While we couldn't quite muster up the courage to eat the donut hamburger, we picked five classic fairground foods that you might encounter at the Stampede, or elsewhere.

BBQ Beef on a Bun ($7, Bronco's Beef Barn)

This beef sandwich is made with a sweet and slightly spicy barbecue sauce and lots of tender roast beef. It was actually pretty tasty and good value. A special shout-out goes to a bored-looking teenager who gave us the sandwich for 50% off (apparently all media are entitled to a food discount, but everyone else charged us full price for their snacks).

Pairing: Australian shiraz, zinfandel

Bloom'n Onion ($10, The Colossal Onion)

At first glance, I referred to The Colossal Onion's Bloom'n Onion as a "thing," because it's basically just a mass of deep fried onion with mayo-based dipping sauce in the centre. The food service workers at The Colossal Onion didn't appreciate their product being called a "thing," which I understand. It's a lot like a gigantic onion ring, but with a lighter batter. It was served with a slightly sweet and smoky, mayo-based sauce that reminded me of chipotle ranch dip.

Pairing: Unoaked chardonnay, inexpensive sparkling wine

Smokies — Sausage with Fried Onions ($7.50, Smokies and Kolbassa Tent)

I told Claire that we should get our smokie with onions on it, which I'm not sure she appreciated, considering we had just eaten an entire onion. Either way, she was a good sport and enjoyed her smokie with onions and mustard, and I had mine with ketchup. We didn't get a picture of the smokie, as we ate it too quickly. However, it was slightly spicy and salty — standard barbecue fare.

Pairing: Beer! A lager or a wheat ale would be best. If you must have wine, gewürztraminer. But seriously, go for the beer.

Chocolate-Dipped Banana ($4, Granny's Cheesecake & More)

We originally were going to try chocolate-dipped cheesecake, but immediately wussed out on sight and went for a morsel of fruit. The banana was frozen and coated in melted milk chocolate. It was tasty, but I could have made it at home.

Pairing: White icewine, late harvest

Mini-Donuts ($6 for 18, The Nameless Mini-Donut Truck with Homer Simpson's Voice Playing on the Speakers)

We had to end our culinary adventure with mini-donuts, the snack that has made Stampede gluttony famous. A special shout-out goes to our mini-donut server Russel, who demonstrated advanced donut-flipping wrist technique. We opted for the cinnamon sugar donuts and they were hot and delicious.

Pairing: Sweet and/or ice cider